Indian Big Ass

My mother and even my dad seemed to be broken after that funeral. My graduation from high school wasn't cause for any celebration. I just got on a bus the next day to start my career with the Unites States Air Force. The rest, so they said, was history. At least little bits of history as it happened at the time. Since Eddie died in some South American shit hole. I seemed to be drawn to the area. I'm not sure if it's coincidence, or I just gravitate to it. I guess shit happens, like it is supposed to happen in the end.By the time my memories got to my basic training in Texas, we had reached the river landing. I was the first to see the aluminum river patrol boat tied to the rickety pier. If it wasn't from the actual war in Vietnam, it was from that time period for sure. Just as were the small arms which we carried onto the boat. We had stepped back in time to the war my Dad fought. The one, where if he had been less of a man, I would not have existed in the first place.If you do the. On a rational level, I know that is a ridiculous belief; nonetheless, until recently, this deep seated core belief haunted my subconscious. Yes, I was somewhat inhibited by guilt and shame of my own carnal desires, so I repressed much of my libido. Thus, during our lovemaking, I would rarely achieve an orgasm. Oscar would mount me in the missionary position, and I would caress him while he slid his erection in and out of me. It was pleasant and intimate, and I enjoyed doing this for him, but seldom did I respond sufficiently to approach my own climax.I think the fact that Oscar could not drive me to orgasm himself on a regular basis was a terrible blow to his ego, and led him to look for other ways to satisfy me. I tried to assure him that the tenderness and intimacy we shared were more than adequate. I tried to assure him that he was taking care of all of my needs, but still I think he felt inadequate. Truthfully, I would masturbate once or twice a week to satisfy my own sexual.
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